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Category Archives: Blonde Jokes

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Why are you yelling that?

March 4, 2010 – 05:48

A painting contractor was speaking with a woman about her job.
In the first room, she said she would like a pale blue.
The contractor wrote this down and went to the window, opened it, and yelled out “green side up!”
In the second room, she told the painter she would like it painted in a soft yellow.
He [...]

By Joker | Tagged blonde, painter | Comments (0)

Want me to paint for you?

February 22, 2010 – 07:50

A blonde was recently fired from an M&M factory for throwing away Ws and peeling the shells on the candies. Therefore, she needed a new job to support herself. After going around town asking if anyone needed work done, she found a man who needed a painter.
“I’m here for the paint job,” she said.
“Alright,” said [...]

By Joker | Tagged blonde, paint, porch, porsche | Comments Off

Fallen bridge

February 10, 2010 – 08:48

A blonde and her blond boyfriend went for a walk along the river.
The blonde walked across alone on a wooden bridge. After crossing the river, the bridge fell down.
She called across to her blonde boyfriend telling him that she couldn’t get back.
He yelled in response, “Wait until dark, and I will shine my flash light [...]

By Joker | Tagged blonde, boyfriend, bridge, light | Comments Off

Helping a blonde lose weight

January 29, 2010 – 10:46

A blonde is overweight, so her doctor puts her on a diet.
“I want you to eat regularly for two days, then skip a day, and repeat the procedure for two weeks. The next time I see you, you’ll have lost at least five pounds.”
When the blonde returns, she’s lost nearly 20 pounds.
“Why, that’s amazing!” the [...]

By Joker | Tagged blonde, lost weight, overweight | Comments Off

I deserve a first class seat

January 19, 2010 – 08:44

A blonde gets on an airplane and sits down in the first class section of the plane. The stewardess rushes over to her and tells her she must move to coach because she doesn’t have a first class ticket. The blonde replies, “I’m blonde, I’m smart, I have a good job, and I’m staying in [...]

By Joker | Tagged blonde, jamaica, plane | Comments Off

Slot machine winner

January 7, 2010 – 09:33

A dumb blonde was standing in front of a soda machine outside of a local store. After putting in sixty cents, a root beer pops out of the machine. She set it on the ground, puts sixty more cents into the machine, and pushes another button; suddenly, a coke comes out the machine!
She continued to [...]

By Joker | Tagged dumb blonde, soda maching | Comments Off

Do you see the dead bird?

December 28, 2009 – 08:55

A brunette and a blonde are walking along in a park one morning.
Suddenly, the brunette notices a dead bird. “Awww, look at the dead birdie,” she says sadly.
The blonde stops, looks up into the sky, and says, “Where? Where?”

By Joker | Tagged blonde, brunette, dead bird | Comments Off

Buying drinks at a bar

December 16, 2009 – 09:35

A blonde, a brunette and a redhead went into a bar and ordered their drinks from the bartender.
Brunette: “I’ll have a B and C.”
Bartender:”What is a B and C?”.
Brunette: “Bourbon and Coke.”
Redhead: “And, I’ll have a G and T.”
Bartender: “What’s a G and T?”
Redhead: “Gin and tonic.”
Blonde: “I’ll have a 15.”
Bartender: “What’s a 15?”
Blonde: “7 [...]

By Joker | Tagged bar, blonde, drinks | Comments Off

Unlocking your car

December 4, 2009 – 09:10

Two blondes were recently observed in a parking lot trying to unlock the door of their Mercedes with a coat hanger. Here is their dialogue:
Blonde One: I can’t seem to get this door unlocked!
Blonde Two: Well, you’d better hurry up and try harder! it’s starting to rain, and the top is down!

By Joker | Tagged blondes, car, unlock | Comments Off

First experience horse riding

November 24, 2009 – 09:45

A blonde decides to learn and try horse back riding unassisted without prior experience or lessons. She mounts the horse with great effort, and the tall, shiny horse springs into motion.
It gallops along at a steady and rhythmic pace, but the blonde begins to slip from the saddle. Out of shear terror, she grabs for [...]

By Joker | Tagged blonde, horse | Comments Off
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