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Funny, Stupid, and Banned Commercials

Joker — Sat, 17 Jul 2010 17:19:24 +0000

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Funny, Stupid, and Banned Commercials

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Computer lingo guide

Joker — Fri, 30 Apr 2010 17:03:54 +0000

Monitor – Keep an eye on the wood stove

Megahertz – When a big log drops on your bare foot in the morning

Floppy disk – What you get from piling too much wood into your wood stove

Ram – The hydraulic machine that makes the woodsplitter work

Drive – Getting home during most of the winter to your wood stove

Hard drive – Trying to get home during a heavy snow storm

Prompt – What you wish the mail was during the snow season

Enter – Come on in

Windows – What you must shut when the temperature hits 10 below

Screen – What is a must during black fly season

Chip – What you munch during a football games

Microchip – What’s left in the bag when the normal chips are gone

Modem – What you did to your fields last July

Dot Matrix – Eino Matrix’s wife

Laptop – Where the grandkids sit

Keyboard – Where you’re supposed to put the keys so the wife can find them

Software – Plastic picnic utensils

Mouse – What leaves those little turds in the cupboard

Mainframe – The part of the house that holds up the roof

Port – Where the commercial fishing boats dock

Random Access Memory – When you can’t remember how much you spent on the new deer rifle when wife asks about it

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Computer lingo guide

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How do I get across that river?

Joker — Thu, 29 Apr 2010 15:00:55 +0000

A dumb blonde is walking along, lost, and encounters a deep and wide river. She looks up and down the river for a way across but is unsuccessful in finding one. Yet, when looking to the other side again, she happened to see another blonde on the opposite river bank. She tried calling to her.

“How can I get to the other side of the river?” she shouts loudly.

The other blonde replied “What for? You are already on the other side of the river!”

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How do I get across that river?

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