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Tag Archives: woman

Cosmetic Surgery

May 12, 2010 – 07:50

A woman named Shirley was from Beverly Hills. One day, she had a heart attack and was taken to Cedars Sinai hospital. While on the operating table, she had a near-death experience. She saw God and asked, “Is this it?” God said, “No, you have another 30 to 40 years to live.” Upon her recovery, [...]

By Joker | Posted in Gender Jokes | Also tagged beverly hills, god, heart attack | Comments Off

The Perfect Story

March 12, 2010 – 08:53

There was a perfect man who met a perfect woman. After a perfect courtship, they had a perfect wedding. Their life together was, of course, perfect. One snowy, stormy Christmas Eve this perfect couple was driving along a winding road when they noticed someone at the roadside in distress. Being the perfect couple, they stopped [...]

By Joker | Posted in Gender Jokes | Also tagged accident, courtship, man, perfect, wedding | Comments Off

How To Please a Woman

March 9, 2010 – 13:24

A group of girlfriends are on vacation when they see a 5- story hotel with a sign that reads: “For Women Only.” Since they are without their boyfriends and husbands, they decide to go in. The bouncer, a very attractive guy, explains to them how it works. “We have 5 floors. Go up floor-by-floor, and [...]

By Joker | Posted in Insults Jokes | Also tagged men | Comments Off

inflatable girlfriend

November 27, 2009 – 08:55

A woman who is tired of having a guy hit on her says, “Look … I’m sorry, but I’m just not your type. I’m not inflatable”

By Joker | Posted in Insults Jokes | Also tagged guy, inflatable | Comments Off

I Thought You Were My Wife

November 24, 2009 – 06:00

A completely inebriated man walked into a bar and, after staring for some time at the only woman seated at the bar, walked over to her, placed his hand up her skirt and began fondling her. She jumped up and slapped him silly. He immediately apologized and explained, “I’m sorry. I thought you were my [...]

By Joker | Posted in Bar Jokes | Also tagged bar, drunk | Comments Off

Brain transplant

October 27, 2009 – 10:00

“How can I ever thank you?” gushed a woman to Clarence Darrow, after he had solved her legal troubles. “My dear woman,” Darrow replied, “ever since the Phoenicians invented money there has been only one answer to that question.”

By Joker | Posted in Lawyer Jokes | Also tagged money, troubles | Comments Off

Men Should Listen

October 23, 2009 – 08:55

A man is driving up a steep, narrow mountain road. A woman is driving down the same road. As they pass each other the woman leans out the window and yells, “PIG!!” The man immediately leans out his window and replies, “BITCH!!” They each continue on their way, and as the man rounds the next [...]

By Joker | Posted in Gender Jokes | Also tagged crash, men | Comments Off

Marriage Quotes By Men

October 13, 2009 – 09:29

I married Miss Right. I just didn’t know her first name was Always. It’s not true that married men live longer than single men. It only seems longer. Losing a wife can be hard. In my case, it was almost impossible. A man was complaining to a friend: ‘I had it all – money, a [...]

By Joker | Posted in Gender Jokes | Also tagged husband, man, marriage quotes, wife | Comments Off

Modems beat women

May 11, 2009 – 06:30

Some reasons why a modem is better than a woman: A modem doesn’t ask for a commitment if you use it. Getting a modem to obey you is as simple as typing “AT“. When you’re done using your modem, you can roll over and go to sleep without feeling guilty. A modem won’t say a [...]

By Joker | Posted in Gender Jokes | Also tagged modem | Comments Off

Great to be a woman

April 29, 2009 – 06:45

Reason’s why it’s great to be a woman Free drinks. Free dinners. Free movies. Speeding ticket? What’s that? New lipstick gives you a whole new lease on life. If you have to be home in time for Melrose Place, you can say so, out loud. If you’re not making enough money you can blame the [...]

By Joker | Posted in Gender Jokes | Comments Off

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